More About the Secret Society of WHY - Nicole"s Story
Members of the Secret Society of WHY are drawn to each with an irresistible pull.
Perhaps it's because in the "real world", we're surrounded by people living in a state of comfortable misery - unhappy enough to complain but not enough to do anything about it.
When you move out of comfortable misery and into the Secret Society of WHY, you become willing to ask WHY and you stop accepting, "because that's just the way it is," as an answer.
I was filming a short inspirational video for the Internet, and the minute I met the producer, Nicole, I knew I had found another member of the Secret Society of WHY.
Not only did she instantly put me at ease and bring out the best in me, we had such an amazing connection that I completely forgot I was on camera.
The blaring lights faded and the other people in the room disappeared.
And the natural, conversation we were having immediately got to the heart of my passion and my message.
So I got a great video, but there was more.
Unbeknownst to me, while I was telling my personal story about how I'd mapped out and then created my ideal work life, the wheels were turning inside Nicole's head.
When she probed deeper about how I'd gotten where I am and what advice I have for someone who is thinking about change, she was listening from a very personal place.
Nicole and I were on parallel journeys.
I was drawn to connect with Nicole again, and when I recently visited New York, we arranged to meet.
That's when I discovered how strong the connection had been for her.
Within five minutes of sitting down with Nicole for dinner, it was like speaking to a long lost friend.
As I heard her story, I discovered how she had found her place in the Secret Society of WHY.
She was the only child of immigrant parents from the Philippines, she grew up in San Diego, and attended university in San Francisco.
After she graduated, she moved to New York, giving herself two weeks to "make it.
" By building a successful run in advertising and television, she's thrived in NYC for almost 10 years.
She told me that while she's had every kind of success by outside standards, a deep need wasn't being met.
So she left it all.
She had always wanted to honor her Filipino heritage, and she decided to open up a Filipino restaurant in New York City.
Nicole told me that a turning point for her was hearing a friend's outgoing voicemail message, which identified her by name as well as by professional title.
Nicole knew that she was more than any title; life is about more than titles.
Her friends and industry contacts think she's quite crazy.
New York City is an extremely expensive city, she'll need to raise a substantial amount of capital, and she doesn't know how any of that will happen.
Ah-hah.
She doesn't know how it will happen, but she definitely knows WHY it's so important for her to make it happen.
And she knows everything else will fall into place if she just keeps going.
So she's working long, hard hours in someone else's restaurant, learning the business and meeting lots of other people whose hearts are really in what they're doing.
They don't have titles, but they know WHY they're there.
Being true to yourself is a hard thing to do.
In a way, Nicole is repeating the test she gave herself when she first arrived in New York City, almost ten years ago.
We talked for three hours that day, and we could have talked more.
And we will.
My wife and I already have plans to attend the grand opening of Nicole's restaurant next year.
Members of the Secret Society of WHY need these connections.
And these are not accidental meetings.
We find each other and we will continue to find each other.
We need to contrast our journey through a world full of people who don't quite "get" how we're choosing to live.
Who ask us, "How will you do that?" instead of listening to WHY we're doing it.
I was a little freaked out by the strong pull I felt towards Nicole, by our immediate and deep connection, by the sense that we would meet again.
And as I often tell my coach, Lissa, I'm getting comfortable with getting freaked out.
© Shawn Shepheard, 2007.
Perhaps it's because in the "real world", we're surrounded by people living in a state of comfortable misery - unhappy enough to complain but not enough to do anything about it.
When you move out of comfortable misery and into the Secret Society of WHY, you become willing to ask WHY and you stop accepting, "because that's just the way it is," as an answer.
I was filming a short inspirational video for the Internet, and the minute I met the producer, Nicole, I knew I had found another member of the Secret Society of WHY.
Not only did she instantly put me at ease and bring out the best in me, we had such an amazing connection that I completely forgot I was on camera.
The blaring lights faded and the other people in the room disappeared.
And the natural, conversation we were having immediately got to the heart of my passion and my message.
So I got a great video, but there was more.
Unbeknownst to me, while I was telling my personal story about how I'd mapped out and then created my ideal work life, the wheels were turning inside Nicole's head.
When she probed deeper about how I'd gotten where I am and what advice I have for someone who is thinking about change, she was listening from a very personal place.
Nicole and I were on parallel journeys.
I was drawn to connect with Nicole again, and when I recently visited New York, we arranged to meet.
That's when I discovered how strong the connection had been for her.
Within five minutes of sitting down with Nicole for dinner, it was like speaking to a long lost friend.
As I heard her story, I discovered how she had found her place in the Secret Society of WHY.
She was the only child of immigrant parents from the Philippines, she grew up in San Diego, and attended university in San Francisco.
After she graduated, she moved to New York, giving herself two weeks to "make it.
" By building a successful run in advertising and television, she's thrived in NYC for almost 10 years.
She told me that while she's had every kind of success by outside standards, a deep need wasn't being met.
So she left it all.
She had always wanted to honor her Filipino heritage, and she decided to open up a Filipino restaurant in New York City.
Nicole told me that a turning point for her was hearing a friend's outgoing voicemail message, which identified her by name as well as by professional title.
Nicole knew that she was more than any title; life is about more than titles.
Her friends and industry contacts think she's quite crazy.
New York City is an extremely expensive city, she'll need to raise a substantial amount of capital, and she doesn't know how any of that will happen.
Ah-hah.
She doesn't know how it will happen, but she definitely knows WHY it's so important for her to make it happen.
And she knows everything else will fall into place if she just keeps going.
So she's working long, hard hours in someone else's restaurant, learning the business and meeting lots of other people whose hearts are really in what they're doing.
They don't have titles, but they know WHY they're there.
Being true to yourself is a hard thing to do.
In a way, Nicole is repeating the test she gave herself when she first arrived in New York City, almost ten years ago.
We talked for three hours that day, and we could have talked more.
And we will.
My wife and I already have plans to attend the grand opening of Nicole's restaurant next year.
Members of the Secret Society of WHY need these connections.
And these are not accidental meetings.
We find each other and we will continue to find each other.
We need to contrast our journey through a world full of people who don't quite "get" how we're choosing to live.
Who ask us, "How will you do that?" instead of listening to WHY we're doing it.
I was a little freaked out by the strong pull I felt towards Nicole, by our immediate and deep connection, by the sense that we would meet again.
And as I often tell my coach, Lissa, I'm getting comfortable with getting freaked out.
© Shawn Shepheard, 2007.
